Job Opening

We are not thrilled to report that the following position will soon be open. Therefore we are currently accepting applications for 'Best Friends' at our Anthem, AZ location.

Sadly, the Ashworths have gone delusional and have decided to move to Utah right in time for a long cold snowy winter. Hopefully our relationship with them didn't push them to this breaking point. Luckily they didn't read the fine print in their contract that waives us of any damages, financial or emotional.

Job #123456 - Harbeck's Anthem Best Friends

Qualifications:

• Must have laid back, humorous and sarcastic personalities
• Must have patience for abnormal random events that occur while in the Harbeck presence
• Must have matching one syllable names AND have a disregard for common spelling such as double consonants (aka Mat and Jes)
• Must own an off road vehicle and have a love for dirt. Maxi Pad Attire on the forehead to collect sweat definitely NOT a requirement.
• Must have perfect kids that will always make the Harbeck kids look unruly...even on their best behavior days. (added this one for you Mat!)
• Must be Cosmetology Board Certified and have a convenient in home salon.
• Must have an overwhelming love for cheap tacos AND be willing to frequent the same restaurant and torment the same waitress every Tuesday.
• Must live within a 2 minute distance. Also must have a home situated close to a main street so we can easily do a drive by and check up on you.
• Must have vehicles with excellent battery power
• Must have mild mannered children that don't cry when Anden undoubtedly tackles or "hugs" them too tight.
• Must NEVER report us to child services for any accidental questionable avoidable happenings...like babies falling through screen doors, etc.
• Must have a toy trailer for back up purposes. This is especially necessary after Jeremy rips off the RV gate with our trailer and flattens the tire in the process.
• Must train your kids to sit in a stroller for the first year of their life. No exceptions.

Harbeck Inc. is an Equal Opportunity Employer. We are committed to a diverse and exciting workplace. Please submit all applications and materials by Oct 31st. If you're really lucky, you might get a call back from us...ok so more like a text. We're not so good at returning calls.

*Referral Bonus Included*: We are in fact desperate enough to pay you to find us friends.